Closet Case

by Kimberly Hammond
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She wasn’t quite sure when the urge first hit her, but as far back as Shea could remember there had always been this secret and confusing longing for feminine affection. It was the want for the faintest scent, the softest touch, and the accidental contact of a female’s body that made butterflies jump ecstatically in her stomach causing an intense ache to pulsate throughout her whole body. Even the warm, moist spot between her thighs would throb uncontrollably and for the longest time she thought it to be embarrassingly wrong for it to be throbbing that way, not to mention for that reason.

She had irresistible urges to offer massages to females, just so she could jump at the opportunity to feel the sensual ways that their muscles would move under her touch when she applied the slightest amount of pressure. She loved the sounds that they would make, ever so softly, moaning with enjoyment at how good it felt to have Shea’s hands on their bodies. Secretly, in her mind, she too was making the same sounds and was yearning to learn more. Yet, everyone always made her feel wrong for feeling that way and told her that it would be thought disgusting if she acted on it, so Shea fought it off as long as she could.

Prior to high school, Shea made pointless attempts to like boys in order to help her ignore her urges. But just as Shea’s did, their curiosity of the female body increased faster than their age did. And when the boys began to aggressively grope her curvaceous and almost fully developed body, her stomach would turn at the disgusting thoughts of what her friends were suggesting that she should be letting the boys do and she refused. The thought of letting a boy put his mouth anywhere near hers was inconceivable, but society let Shea know that her being with a female was not allowed, so she continued to fight off the urges that were raging inside of her. Her parents complained about her comfortable choice of boyish attire and she began to get inquisitive looks from her neighbors over it too, but she stood her ground and refused to date anyone. She began to play softball and pushed herself to make the near impossible catches that no one else could make, drastically trying to keep as many of her aches and urges as under control as she could. But once in high school, Shea’s social pleasing side began to lose and it started to become more and more difficult for her to fight her urges.

One night at her best friend’s birthday party, Shea had been drinking off and on all night, but she refused to get drunk for fear of doing or saying something that, because all her friends would be there to see, she wouldn’t be able to face in the morning. But, whoever knows exactly how drunk they are ahead of time? Even though she could feel the burn in her chest and throat from the Jack and Coke she had just drank, Shea also felt another kind of burn on her back so intense that it caused her spine to tingle so bad that she was forced to stop dancing and see where it’s coming from. As Shea scanned the room, she was snatched into the caramel calm of the most beautiful golden brown eyes that she had ever seen. As she looked into those eyes, she could see and feel exactly what this girl was thinking. A mirror image of the things that had been running through her head for years looked back at Shea from within those eyes and her body began to react to this mysterious girl in ways that she’d never felt before. Someone shattering a glass near by snapped Shea back to reality and she was immediately met with a smile from this mesmerizing female, so mischievous and inviting, that it made a shiver run down her body and she instantly got hot. Shea suddenly felt like everyone had watched the look that the two had just shared across the room, though they hadn’t, and that they knew exactly what was running through her head. She felt claustrophobic and needed to escape for a moment to clear her head, so she headed for the nearest door.

To her relief, the crisp night air relieved her skin of some of its heat. She closed her eyes and took in a few deep breaths to try and slow down her breathing. Just as she got her body to stop shaking, which definitely wasn’t from the cold, she felt someone walk up close behind her. Thinking that it was a friend, she turned quickly around before they could touch her. As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, her heart immediately skipped a beat and her stomach started fluttering uncontrollably as she was once again became lost in those eyes, this time much closer and more inviting but still saying the same thing as before. Her smile was now gone and her eyes seemed to be urging Shea closer now that the attraction was known and felt to be mutual. She stepped closer, so close that the faint smell of alcohol on both our breaths mixed with her perfume and tantalized Shea’s nose with the scent of her. Shea felt every breath that the girl took as it blew lightly on her neck, cheek, and ear as she leaned in closer. Shea’s heart began to beat faster as she felt the girl slowly inhale a deep breath to take in her scent, her clit began to throb with each beat of her heart, and her body was so hot that she thought that she would become engulfed in flames. And although it felt to Shea like she was already all over her, the girl still stepped a little closer. Her breasts now pressed against Shea’s and intensified the throb between her legs so much that she was just waiting for it to burst with ecstasy, leaving her sweet juices to flow freely from within. As the mysterious girl put her arms around Shea, resting her hands on her lower back, she lightly rubbed her cheek against Shea’s, whose body had begun to shake uncontrollably with pleasure from the caresses of this girls hands on her body and she couldn’t stop herself from letting out a soft moan that seemed to invite this girl to get even closer as she stepped a leg between Shea’s legs and pulled her closer.

The sound of approaching footsteps broke her spell on Shea and for a moment all her fears of being seen as a social outcast or a disappointment to her parents came rushing back. She jumped back, putting her hand over her mouth, as she pulled away from what had just caused her to become so engulfed in heat, confusion, and wants. She stood there for a moment, looking into the eyes that she now realized how much she enjoyed getting lost in, and noticed the pain that she was now seeing there. At that moment, a shockwave of electricity felt like it had shot through her body and awakened an emotion that she had never felt before and she dropped her. She suddenly felt free and it made her smile. She took the steps needed to place her right in front of this girl, noses and bodies almost touching, and asked “What’s your name?”

“Alecia,” she said with a smile, as the pain dimmed a little in her eyes. “What’s yours?”

Shea responds, “Shea,” as she puts her arms around Alecia and leans in to softly touch her lips to hers just as the footsteps stop and as a glass shatters somewhere behind them, but it doesn’t matter because she’s not a closet case anymore. Shea freed her happiness the moment their lips touched and it felt good, and so did Alecia.

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